What If?
by Weaver Of Interest
Summary: Rated R for later chapters Shounen Ai and possibly Yaoi in later chapters I am not going to give away any of the story here so click and read...Let pretend for a minute that Bakura doesn't exist ^_^
1. Chapter One

Disclaimer:I dont own Yugioh and If I did I would be pretty damn happy....  
  
::stands in open field:: Flame me Throw bricks Drop bombs too Just give me credit where credit is due *Arisusa out*  
  
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Sleep is a nice way to escape it thats about the only thing I can do....sleep and think. How could I? Sleep is the only way to escape this relentless pain,you can't think when you are asleep.I hate thinking........I think to much about things I shouldn't be thinking.My mind wanders to thoughts of 'what if?'....it matters little now...soon this will all be over. Everyone and everything that ties me down..........  
So I lie in bed wondering when he'll be home. Hoping it isn't soon.....I don't know how much more of this I can stand.I've been in bed for four days straight.....I have no will to live...The only one I love is gone......oh you want to hear the story? Very well......  
  
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I remember everything about that day.......  
  
It was about 3 weeks ago, a warm day. Perfect for going to the park...thats actually what I decided to do. Jonounchi had called and asked me to go to the park with him....said he had to ask me something........  
Thankfully Ishtar hadn't been around...I still had to get home before he came back..so I had to be quick.I met Joey by the pond under a tree. It was a beautiful true with-forgive me I'm ranting...  
There was something about him that was different. He looked nervous or anxious..it made me concerned couldn't figure out what was different but it was pulling me closer to him emotionally. He looked in my direction and waved his eyes gleaming as I walked closer.  
  
"A! How Ya Doin Ryou?"  
  
"Hello Jounouchi...I am fine..."  
  
His face turned from happy to concerned as he looked at my cheek. In my hurry I had forgotten to put cover-up on it.Yes I pu cover-up on it....thats not the point. I had been from Ishtar...a beating because I had answered the phone. After he beat me he was running around the house screaming about flying purple people eaters.....and the effects they have on our country today. He is crazy....you know that.  
Jounouchi looked me in the eyes a serious looked rested on his face.I felt warmth as his hand rested on my cheek. A smile in his eyes but seriousness still slashed across his face.He could never lose the smile in his eyes...atleast I thought you could never lose it. " "You dont look fine Ryou....Did Ishtar hurt you again...you ca-"  
  
"Jounouchi it isn't any of your business just stay out of it."  
  
I turned my back to him and crossed my arms.I heard him move I expected he was leaving.....There is just another thing I was wrong about. I felt warmth like someone breathing on the back of my neck and felt his hands slid around my waist.Was he hugging me from behind??  
  
"I care about ya Ryou..it is my business."  
  
I didn't respond I was to comfortable to say anything that could ruin this moment. I found myself wanting to stand there with him for ever...I had never till that day thought of Jounouchi as anything but a friend. So thats were things started going down hill faster than they already had. I couldn't leave Ishtar...make no mistake I didn't love him.....I feared him.  
I was lost in thought....what was I to do? Jounouchi made my mind go blank by turning me around and kissing me softly on the forehead.Thats was it...I gave in to the urge I had been feeling that whole afternoon..I gently and playfully pushed him up against the tree and return his kiss for one on the lips.  
  
"Ryou...."  
  
Is this what I wanted or was this just a distraction for myself because I could never hope to have this with Ishtar?I kissed him again longer this time pushing his head as far up against the tree that it could go,his waist coming closer to my own.  
  
"JOUNOUCHI!!!RYOU!!!"  
  
I cursed to myself.Damn it was Yugi!Joey kept his hand around my waist as Yugi neared a knowing grin on his face.What if he told Ishtar..Jounouchi.....Jounouchi gave me a reassuring look....trying to mentally tell me everything is alrigh.Is this what I need? I realize now that I was only truly happy when in his arms.  
  
"Well...good afternoon you two..I wasn't aware you guys were an item.."  
  
Yugi said a dorky little smile on his face.Jounouchi held me there making it hard for me to move away from him.He was gentle about it but I still questioned why he kept me in his arms. Jounouchi grinned and looked from me to Yugi.  
  
"Yeah Danks For Da Advice Buddy"  
  
So Yugi had known Jounouchi was going to do this. Not the most romantic moment I had with him......Yugi looked away trying to act as though he didn't know what Jounouchi was talking about. I began to panic..what if Ishtar found out? What if Yugi told him. I broke from Juonouchi's grip and dropped to my knees.  
  
"Please Yugi Dont Ever Say Anything About This To Anyone."  
  
I still to this day think Yugi is not trust worthy.This is all his fault all my fault......Ishtar can never know..I was afraid for Jounouchi..afraid for myself.  
  
"Oh....I Understand I Won't..Jou-Kun I Came To Get You...We Have To Go Do That Thing...."  
  
"Oh Ya! I Forgot!"  
  
Jounouchi looked at me and then to Yugi. He gave him a look that said 'Start walkin..' Yugi turned in repsonse and headed in the direction he had come from.Jounouchi moved closer to me as I stood up he put his arms around my waist and pulled me towards him. I loved the way he used to hold me....Our lips meet...he roughly pressed his hips up against mine. His lips moved slowly to my neck and he nibbled for a second pushing his hips harder against me.  
  
"Meet me hea..tanight..11:30..."  
  
I nodded breathless as he whipered in my ear. I couldn't tell him no....I wouldn't tell him no..I didnt want to let go of him. I threw my arms around his neck and hugged him tight. He smiled and turned away walking up the hill towards the waiting Yugi. So what if?.............  
  
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Did you likey??Please tell me if you did!!...I would love to get some reviews...I am adding more chapters I already have everything in my head ..and The way I see it your never going to suspect the ending unless you are really really good. ^_^ More chapters to come! 


	2. Chapter Two

Disclaimer:I don't own it..wanna give it to me?? Flame All You Want --------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
Shit!I had been gone for an hour or so.....Ishtar was going to know I left.I was terrified...............what could I tell him so he wouldn't hit me?Nothing..Even if I hadn't gone out he would come home and hit me.But I just made it worse for myself.I made it back to the apartment before 5:00pm. I opened the door to see Ishtar sitting on the bed..milinuem staff by his side. A menacing look played on his face.  
  
"Where.........have you been?"  
  
"I-I-I....went to the store."  
  
Ishtar got up,a knowing look taking over his face. OH My god.....had he seen me? Itseemed like he knew something by the look on his face.  
  
"Dont bullshit me..."  
  
"Ishtar-kun I-"  
  
He walked over to me and cut me off with a backhand.A gold ring of his sliced my face so that small drip of blood fell to the floor.I turned to face him.  
  
"Koi..I-"  
  
"Did I say you could speak?"  
  
I shook my head not wanting to make him more angry. Tears of frustration and emtional pain welled in my eyes..I wouldn't let them fall.He pushed me roughly into the wall causing me to hit my head.He backhanded me agian as I slidded down the wall.He kneeled to my level and kissed me.  
  
"Tell me where you were..."  
  
I didn't respond I couldn't everything inside me buckled.I couldn't even blink I could barely breath. Ishtar looked me in the eye. His eyes were cold and heartless...not caring about anything.....I didnt expect him to love me..I was just a toy I knew that much.  
He narrowed his eyes at my silence picked me up. He punched me once and twisted my wrist until I could move it no longer..He punched me again right in the face and I was out.The room spun for a few seconds and turned black.All this emtional and pyshical pain was too much for me... The last thing that popped into my head before I lost conscienceness was Jounouchi....did I really love him or was it something else.  
  
I woke up to find myself laying in our bed....damn Ishtar..I am not wearing any pants and my head throbs so bad.Looking around the room I saw he was gone. I wonder where to..maybe he we-JOUNOUCHI...what time is it what time is it??? I scrambled through the darkness looking for the clock...  
  
1:15Am  
  
Ow..oh God my head hurts and I will be able to meet Jounouchi.......I don't know if I could stand to be caught again. I threw on a pair of pants and a black shirt..There was no time to waste...I attempted to put on my shoe but failed at using my left hand.Ishtar had hurt it bad I couldn't even move it.....looking down at my wrist I saw it was bruised..badly..I wrapped it in a linen cloth and continued struggling with my shoes. Eventually succeeding I was out the door.  
  
My eyes were starting to adjust to light outside or lack-there of. There in the same spot as this afternoon stood Jounouchi waiting patiently. I approached him slowly glad that there was not alot of light. The lack of light made my face and arm unnoticeable.  
  
"Dare You Are I Was Gettin Worried...."  
  
"....Sorry....."  
  
I frowned and look sadly at the ground as Jounouchi walked closer to me.We stood inches apart as he looked around. He moved closer and I stood still avoiding his gaze..I didnt want him to know anything.He pulled me closer placing his arm around my waist and leaning up against the tree like earlier.  
  
"Ryou.....whats da matter....He hit you again didn't he??"  
  
I looked away not answering him..was it that obvious. I started shaking...shaking out of fear shaking out of frustration and shaking from just plain cold. Jounouchi pulled me close attempting to comfort me..nothing could help me from this pain and fear..I was so scared.  
  
"Come on..."  
  
"W-Where Are We Going Jounouchi?"  
  
"To My House....I Want To See If You Are Alright..."  
  
I didn't want to argue or question anymore. I wanted someone to take care of me. Someone to help me......  
  
Jounouchi opened the door to his house and flicked on the lights.  
  
"Oh My God Ryou"  
  
"What?"  
  
"He Really Did It This Time.."  
  
Jounouchi said more and more rage building up inside him. He moved me under the light and softly touched my face. His touch was soft but still it hurt.He moved to hold my left hand and I pulled back in pain.He glanced at me questionatively...might as well get it over with. I held it out and rolled the linen bandage off of it. Revealing my black and blue wrist, grimacing at every turn around my arm it did.  
  
"You Can't Let Him Do This...Your Face Is Black And Blue You Have A Slash On Your Cheek And Your Wrist Is Broken.."  
  
I slumped to the floor. I couldn't stand anything anymore. I begged for death anything to stop this pain.His hand found a path through my hair as he tried to sooth me.I curled into the fetal postion as he layed down on the floor beside me. He rolled over and cuddled next to me. My face was streaked in tears I couldn't take this anymore........  
  
I drifted into a restful sleep conflicted by contentness with Jounouchi and fear of what would happen if Ishtar found me.....Why did I let myself fall asleep...I'll always wonder what if......What if I didn't --------------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
More chapters to come cause everyone I have talked to said they liked it......I love you rooney and willis!!!! 


	3. Chapter Three

Disclaimor: Dont Own It Just Love To Write About It  
  
"YUGI!YUGI!YUUUUUUGIII"  
  
Ishtar yelled banging on the door to Yugi's house. Enemies still he knew Ryou was friends with him. Maybe this is were he had gone to. Either way someone was going to feel the wrath of Ishtar again tonight.  
  
A light in the living room window flicked on as someone unlocked the door. There stood Yugi's grandfather.He blinked once and looked at Ishtar with a look of questioning.  
  
"Can I help you?...."  
  
"YUGI!"  
  
Ishtar yelled his face burning with rage. How dare Ryou leave the house...How dare he...  
  
"I'm sorry but Yugi is a friend's house and it is 3:00 Am......"  
  
"Old man you will find me Yugi.."  
  
"Good night"  
  
Yugi's grandfather attempted to close the door but Ishtar stuck his foot in the door. Millniuem Rod in hand he forced himself in the house. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------  
  
I woke to a soft nibbling on my ear.I went to roll over not realizing I was now on a bed. Nice red silk sheets and a fluffy pillow under my head.My throbbing headache had finally come to and end and Jounouchi was spooned up the the side of me his arm over my side holding me tight.  
  
It was a wonderful thing to wake up to. God forbid Ishtar ever hold me..god forbid he ever love me...God forbid he didn't hurt me. Make me cry Make me bleed. I rolled onto my back....Jounouchi took this oppurtunity to roll ontop of me and kiss my nose.  
  
He rubbed his nose playfully on my cheek and grinned.  
  
"Mornin Koi...Daijoubo?"  
  
"Morning..hai..daijoubo"  
  
He looked at my wrist....the swelling had gone down somewhat but it was still black and blue and almost unmoveable.Jounouchi kissed it gentley...I winched...he had meant well but it hurt alot.He rolled back to his side of the bed and got up throwing on his shirt.  
  
"What do you want for breakfast Ryou-chan.."  
  
"I-I'm not hungry...."  
  
"Pancakes it is...."  
  
Jounouchi said a small smile teasing his face.He ran his hand through his hair and walked out of the room. There I sat alone again...I am a very lonely person..used to it but still lonely. I shook my head getting the hair out of my face I sat on the edge of the bed blankets falling off me revealing my bare chest I looked in the mirror that faced the bed.  
  
My chest was slightly black and blue too...a cut on my ribs from the last time..I remember that time. He took out the millienuim rod..for the first time I felt myself becoming angry. Instead of fear or sadness I felt..anger..  
  
"JOUNOUCHI!!!"  
  
The sounded of some screaming and frantically running into the house broke my thoughts as I jumped from the bed and stuck my head out the bedroom down. It sounded like Yugi...What could be the problem? I scooted silently into the kitchen to see Yugi in Jounouchi's arms crying....completely distressed. I went over to him....Ishtar???  
  
"What wrong Yugi.."  
  
"Grandpa........."  
  
"Huh?What happened?!?!?!"  
  
Yugi pushed Jounouchi away roughly and exited the house. Jounouchi confused and curious attempted to follow. I grabbed his wrist and looked sadly into his eyes.  
  
"Can I come?"  
  
"I'm not your boss..you can do whatever you want...I am not like 'him'...."  
  
He walked off as I followed from the looks of it we were heading towards Yugi's house. We had lost him in the crowd...short and fast isn't a good mixture to get lost in a crowd with.  
  
It wasn't hard however to not notice Yugi's house. Several Police cars surronded it...men and women walking around in dark blue suits asking everyone that would speak questions. Over in the corner of the front yard stood Yugi and his mother. He was comforting her as she sobbed histerically into her hands.What was going on? Had the old man had a heart attack? Getting closer to Yugi I noticed how pale he was. Speechless and white like a part of him had died.  
  
Jounouchi ignoring the police tape walked into the house I followed quietly behind him.The scence was very distressing...the rooms in the front of the house all torn everything broken. I followed Jounouchi into the kitchen...The smell of blood tingled my nose. There layed Surgoku's limp lifeless body...a detective inspecting around it was the only one in the room...she hadn't noticed us yet.I backed up to look at the room completely.  
  
Sweet God I remember every horrifying detail.All over the walls written in blood..my name...over and over again..written in Surgoku's blood. Fear shook through my body sending me into violent shakes.I turned above the doorway written in Ishtar's crooked handwritting.  
  
'See What Happens When You Are Naughty Ryou?'  
  
I dropped to my knees and buried my face in my hands.  
  
"All my fault..All my fault..."  
  
There was a shuffling of feet as the detective got up and turned to us. Her face blank...she must have been used to this by now. She walked over to us and looked around before speaking.  
  
"You two knew the victim.....?I am detective Miusho...Do you know anything at all..that you think might help our case."  
  
I turned pale..I could tell Jounouchi wanted me to say something about Ishtar about how he treated me.Something about anything but I couldn't big myself to do it. If I had would it have changed the future?? Probably......but all we can do is wonder...what if...... ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---- There is the third chapter..I am entirely sorry if it is short but the middle of the story is laging this is probably the most boring and stupid chapter...Arigatou to my very good friend Kora-chan for helping through character reactions...even though you mostly confused me..suki da! To the rest of you..please review it made me so happy when someone emailed me the other day and tol me they had never thought of jou and ryou as a couple..thank you for reviewing you know who you are... 


	4. Chapter Four

Disclaimor:  
  
Me:I own it no more now then I did in the third chapter..or the second or the one before that or the one before that or the one before that or even the one bef-  
  
Kora-chan: Arisusa-chan we get it.....  
  
Me: Yes'm ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------  
  
Jounouchi looked at me...hurt in his eyes... was I defending Ishtar by not saying anything to the detective? I couldn't take this. I turned on my heel and jogged out of the house. Down the street I ran faster and faster past more and more people. I was breathing heavy..panting..I ducked into and alley way that seemed to be deserted.  
  
"DiD YoU EnJoY YoUr NiGhT OuT RyOu-ChAn?"  
  
Chills drove up my spine.I knew that voice.I could feel him lurking closer to me from the shadows.I held my breath completely and turned around to face him.His eyes were darker than usual..he was pale..had he been worried.??..Yes worried that I had found someone else....Not about my welfare.  
  
He grabbed my shoulders and pushed me into a wall. I was shaking with fear....would he kill this time...or maybe next...I knew it would come to death eventaully for me. He forcefully kissed me and nibbled at my neck.He held my arms to the wall and looked into my eyes full of hurt and ....hatred? A new emtion boiled inside of me.  
  
"RyOu...."  
  
He chuckled into my ear the faint smell of alchol on his breath.How long could I take this? These new feelings inside me were conflicting with the old. Begging me to take a stand to make my move...to do something anything. I dropped my head and took in a deep breath realizing no matter how hard I tried I couldn't do anything.Not for love..For fear.  
  
"KoI AnSwEr Me...."  
  
I froze..by now you would think I could deal with these..By now you would think I would be able to respond. He looked at me again the smell of blood lingered on..Surgoku's blood..His face twicthed in anger as he slapped me and I fell to the ground..hugging my legs to my chest.  
  
"I AsKeD YoU HoW YoUr NiGhT WaS NoW AnSwEr Me......EvErYtImE YoU DiSoBeY Me OnE Of YoUr FrIeNdS WiLl Be PlUcKeD FrOm ThE EaRtH.....GoT It?"  
  
I nodded and began to stand slowly. I must have done it to slow..Ishatr decided to help me by pulling my hair up roughly making me yelp.  
  
"Ryou!!!"  
  
I spun my head pulling from Ishtar's grip as Jounouchi wheeled around the corner with Honda Yami and Kaiba. Jounouchi quickened his pace and in seconds I found myself on my feet flying towards him. I fell into his embrace he hugged me tightly trying to calm my shaking body. Ishtar grunted in frustration as he stomped toward Jounouchi. Tristan and Kaiba walked toward Ishtar adralin pumped looks danced on their faces. Around the corner to the alleyway came six or seven of Kaiba's bodyguards all dressed in black trench coats...consealed weapons.  
  
A frown played at the ends of Ishtars lips as the bodyguards approached. He shook his head in pur rage. I knew for a fact he liked to keep his kills soundless..and with all these bodyguards that would take some effort. He smirked and winked at me..Jounouchi still held me tight in his arms as I buried my head in his chest he placed a hand on my hair and ran his fingers through it quietly comforting me.  
  
Ishtar cackled at our embrace.  
  
"It WoN't LaSt AnD YoU'Ll BoTh Be SoRry...I'lL Be BaCk FoR YoU RyOu-ChAn"  
  
With that he vanished completely gone. I never found out how he did that. It doesn't matter now and I doubt it mattered before either.The details after that are alittle hazy in my mind. I remember waking up Jounouchi holding me..we were in a car..Kaiba's limo..Across from me sat Kaiba and Honda hand in hand laughing and smiling..One of the first times I ever saw Kaiba smiling.  
  
"Are you alright Ryou...He didn't hurt you or anything?"  
  
"Not too bad...I'll be fine."  
  
I looked out the window to see miles of trees in the distance winding roads everywhere. Where could we possibly be going? The outline of a mansion was seeable over the trees...Kaiba's house. Why there? If Ishtar hadn't seen Kaiba protect me he would never have thought of looking here...but now it would be the first place he looked.  
  
"Why are we....This is going to be one of the first places Ishtar looks..why are we going to Kaiba's house....?"  
  
"No koi...This is Pegeasus's house...He is away and he heard of our situation he immediately said we could stay here."  
  
Brillant Jounouchi..why would Ishtar search for me here? He wouldn't..even if he knew I was here would he dare?....Never mind I know he would...He is insane. The car pulled to a stop in the front of the house as the door open Jounouchi got out first latching onto my hand and guiding me out. Honda came out and Kaiba next. I felt care free...for a second in time I thought everything would be fine....Its funny out fate turns..  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---- Hmmmmm maybe this chapter sucked alot..and maybe it didn't I need to know so please review and tell me.All I have to say is that if this sucked then keep reading because I can't wait for people to email me about the end...no one is going to expect it mwahaha well maybe you will...probably ::shrug:: I give you credit if you do guess it before you read it!! Ja Ne Minna- san!!! 


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